Because I am an adult and these sorts of things are very normal. Minus the blood in my mouth.

making things out of unusual materials

ways to reuse things that don’t look ‘upcycled’

i like to, and want to, be ‘green’, but not granola-y

In general, I want, and need, this coming year to be a fiscally responsible year for me. I’d like to start saving money again, and work really hard if/when I get a job because I’m very determined to have a dog. I think a dog is a really important thing that I’m missing in my life. This goal will start, in part, with Matthew’s help on January 1st. We’re going to make a contract and stick to it! There should be some sort of (mostly fun) punishment for whoever breaks it.

I would also like to be more physically fit, which is unfortunately a very common NYE resolution. I think, though, that if I had weights at home, etc. I’d have one LESS excuse as to why I didn’t do anything. We have lots of streamable fitness DVDs on Netflix, and so I think I should create a really achievable work-out routine.

I also have this great idea for a website/blog, and I’m very excited to get working on it. I don’t really know what my end goal for it is yet. There are some bloggers already on the internet that are doing bits and pieces of what I want to do, so I don’t know how to approach them yet. I would feel really bad if I made something successful and left them out.  I hope that I can actually make this into a thing! I’m very excited! Plus, it will involve getting people to code, etc. and I’ve always wanted to do something big

ALSO I would love to get EVEN MORE stuff done around the house. I was reading someone’s blog yesterday about how they’re excited to finally be working on the super small parts of their home (handles, small floor stuff, nail holes, etc.) and I would love to really get a lot of stuff accomplished this coming year, house-wise. I think clearly this is another example of ‘something I need to break into smaller goals’; I know the lady at The Brick House had one general goal of ‘exterior’ this past year, and then spent all of her time doing that. Maybe my goal should be ‘sun-room’ for 6 months and ‘office’ for 6 months?! We’ll see!

I also would like to get my website in order, and submit a lot of things to blogs and reap all the internet-fame-benefits. I’d like that a lot.

I ALSO want to pick back up on my ‘make something cool everyday’ thing. I really want to get something like that done! Ugh!

ALSO I want to get on a better schedule. I’d love to have better sleep. I don’t really sleep that well, and it totally screws up everything else.

So, to re-cap and cut myself of before I keep going FOREVER:

• save $$$$ -> accomplish dog
• be more physically active -> get dumbbells and work-out at home! (NO EXCUSES)
• create super awesome blog/website -> make design, write some stuff, talk to people
• housey things -> decide on a room or two to decorate/organize over time, and get it done (short term goals actually getting done!!!!)
• accomplish portfolio website zen -> send all my awesomeness away to blogs for internet fame
• create something cool every single day! consistently! -> setting a schedule so that I have a free 30-min – hour chunk everyday
• sleep better! -> create a reliable nightly routine so that I can rest easier
• Take an hour once a week to sit down and write about myself, and my feelings; a personal therapy

Trying to get through the next three weeks with alternating decorating and scholastic exercises.

I’m just ready for a change of pace. I don’t really know what’s going to happen in my near future. I feel really sad and scared almost all of the time the past few months, and it’s just hard to explain to people because they don’t understand. School is over-the-top hard for me right now, and I don’t know if I’m ever going to graduate because my parents are essentially giving up on me already.

It really sucks to feel abandoned and unloved and bad at math!
And my boyfriend is always gone and busy, and it makes me really lonely.

(almost posted this to tumblr, but didn’t want to offend)

Who knows?! I just don’t feel like I’m done learning yet – and I know that comes with a workplace, I still would like to learn more at a school. Unfortunately programs at places like Creative Circus, Portfolio Center, and SCAD are all really expensive. Not more expensive than going to Georgia Tech out of state, but still just expensive in general.

It might be awesome to go to SCAD Savannah. The few times I’ve been to Savannah, I’ve really enjoyed it. It would be weird to be further away from Atlanta and family and stuff (like an extra six hours south) – but it’s beautiful there and it might be nice to have a change of pace. Perhaps I can manage to take off a year or so to work and make money (and potentially be ‘in-state’ in case I go to some Georgian state school…?)

It is a tricky situation because of Boyfriend. Will we be together foreverrrr? Who knows. I guess it’s more of a decision you arrive at – “Let’s get married. Let’s be together! FOREVER!” But then what would I do? I guess just work for the year that he has to finish school, and then decide. But it’s strange to depend on other people for your plans…

Maybe I should go to a school in/near Chicago to be closer to my family? That might be nice – shed some perspective on life and living and where I’d like to be. Plus, I am TOTALLY already in-state for Illinios.

I don’t think I have the overall grades for ‘graduate school’, but I do know that I am good at what I’ve done that’s major-related and that my major-related GPA is probably awesome. And I’m in the midst of working on all of my designery things (portfolio, etc.) – so I’ll be prepared if the time comes. Sort of.

It will be 100% weird to be living on my own, and it sucks that I will have debt if I decide to go to graduate school (unless I can convince family members? Err, that’s a horrible thought.) But I also feel so invigorated and passionate when I read some of the course descriptions (hello, CLASS ABOUT BRAINSTORMING!).

I just know that I could do great things – if only I KNEW more.

Just some current thoughts I needed to express, since I’ve been looking around at things on the internet.

I’m going to walk to campus today…? I mean, my car will probably get another ticket if I drive, so I should walk. Plus the weather is nice today.

I’ve been productive lately, just not at things that are good…Okay, more like, I’ve been good at the internet lately, but that ain’t saying much, ya heard?

Gonna go shower, eat, and study now. OH YAH AFTER MOAR INTERNETZ LOL!
day 1 – your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is. / day 2 – where you’d like to be in 10 years. / day 3 – your views on drugs and alcohol. / day 4 – your views on religion. / day 5 – a time you thought about ending your own life. / day 6 – write 30 interesting facts about yourself. / day 7 – your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality. / day 8 – a moment you felt the most satisfied with your life. / day 9 – how you hope your future will be like. / day 10 – discuss your first love and first kiss. / day 11 – put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up. / day 12 – bullet your whole day. / day 13 – somewhere you’d like to move or visit. / day 14 – your earliest memory. / day 15 – your favorite tumblrs. / day 16 – your views on mainstream music. / day 17 – your highs and lows of this past year. / day 18 – your beliefs. / day 19 – disrespecting your parents. / day 20 – how important you think education is. / day 21 – one of your favorite shows. / day 22 – how have you changed in the past 2 years? / day 23 – give pictures of 5 guys who are famous who you find attractive. / day 24 – your favorite movie and what it’s about. / day 25 – someone who fascinates you and why. / day 26 – what kind of person attracts you. / day 27 – a problem that you have had. / day 28 – something that you miss. / day 29 – goals for the next 30 days. / day 30 – your highs and lows of this month.